Let Them

What coaching football has taught me                 I remember looking out at my team of seven- & eight-year-olds the first night we huddled after practice and wondered what in the world I had just signed up for. Until that reality check, I had been admittedly, envisioning famous movie scenes of football glory.  I had thoughts of Coach Yoast’s sideline speech from Remember the Titans and the Clear Eyes Anthem from Friday Night Lights. I had completely overlooked the hard work, patience and dedication it took to coach a team of children. Much less, the despair that came with losing, which was inevitable in the game of football. As I zipped the orange practice cones into my duffel, I realized that I was going to have to muster some courage to give this thing a fighting try. For the sake of those boys, if anything.   Now, I can see how much of what I learned as a coach actually also applies in the business world. Coaching, like leading a business, is often associated with a whole lot of glory and not a lot of actual hard work, sweat and tears.   Most of the moments of coaching are hard ones. Teaching kids requires mind-numbing repetition, breaking concepts down to their simplest forms, dedication, and tons of patience as their attention spans seem to be getting shorter and shorter these days. I won’t say it went well all the time, but it had its glory moments. Even small ones, mostly small ones.   Like the time one of the boys had never tackled a dummy before. Each time it was his turn to do so, he would run up but then freeze in fear. It wasn’t until I demonstrated tackling the dummy that he found the courage to do the same. That night I went home feeling like I had just won something. I had helped a player overcome a paralyzing fear. That meant something to me. That was a glory moment, making all the hard stuff worth it. Just like running a business.   Here’s a couple things I learned coaching that helped me better understand how to lead my business:   You can’t just sit on the sidelines: The game requires 100% of your attention all the time. From the sidelines, you have to be constantly strategizing, calling new plays, and maintaining cool under pressure. I had to learn to control my emotions as I watched my team triumph and fail knowing that I couldn’t do the work for them. Instead, I had to teach them how to do it. I couldn’t explain concepts just once and then hope they got it. I had to get in the dirt to show them, then watch them do it, explain it again, and watch again, until I knew they knew what they were doing and could execute plays with confidence. Leaders teach their team how to execute business strategies the same way. It usually looks like getting in the dirt and pushing that tackle dummy around for awhile until the team finally gets it. There’s no such thing as explaining something once and then watching from the sideline.   Lead from the front: You have to position yourself as the leader,  the one your team looks to and trusts. Your team needs you to be the one who knows how to get the job done, to make the large strategic decisions, to see what’s coming and plan for it, and to take responsibility when things go well and when they don’t. Kids on a football team look to the coach. The coach knows what to do, how to do it and how to win. Without a coach, the team is chaos, running around like wild animals on the field. That won’t win any games. If a leader sits at their desk all day, is generally disengaged or absent from the innerworkings of the team, doesn’t take responsibility, and doesn’t develop trust with their team, then the team is chaos, running around being unproductive. That won’t lead to success.   Understand its hard work: Playing football is hard work. No one shows up to games, having never practiced and expects to win. Business is similar. No one wakes up each morning and simply succeeds. There are practices in the driving rain, and there are practices in the beautiful sunshine. There are plays that get perfectly executed and there are plays that just stink. The point is that the team works together, learns together and commits to the hard work together. When things don’t work out, no one leaves or walks off the field. Instead, they get to work, to be better, stronger and faster.   Working together as a team: Lastly, it’s the team mentality that’s a real winner. It’s not really about winning although it still kinda is, of course. But the true beauty comes when teammates begin to work together as a team. That means they anticipate each other’s movements, they figure out how to help one another, they each take turns scoring touchdowns, they celebrate wins together and band together after loses, knowing there will be more wins on the horizon. The true glory for a coach is not the score, it’s the team working together.   Coaching football, like leading a business, is not for everyone. Some people, like me, find themselves staring down into the expectant faces of their team and realize they had no idea what they signed up for. And if they had known ahead of time, they wouldn’t have signed up. I have to say though, like coaching, leading a business is worth it. At the end of the day, the rewards are far greater than the challenges.

Don’t Quit I’ve been at this for some time now. As a leader, I have seen the good, bad and ugly. I have led through hard times (ahem, Covid) and high times. I have seen shifts in what works and what doesn’t. I have hired good people and not so good people. I have said goodbye to  employees I thought would stay, and applauded underdog employees as they soared and excelled.   I have learned the things that I’m good at and the things that I’m not. I have made great decisions and major mistakes. I have laughed and cried, danced and grieved. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed it and sometimes, wanted to give up completely.   It’s not easy, this leadership thing. Sometimes I feel crazy. Sometimes I feel like I can’t possibly give enough time to both my family and to my job and keep finding time to sleep in the mix. After all of that, after it’s all said and done, I want you to know that it’s worth it.   Thanks to the great leader that my dad was before me, I have witnessed what it looks like to be resilient. He taught me what it looked like to keep going when the odds were not in his favor and when the people around him told him that he would probably fail. He showed me how hard work and staying the course leads to success and how vision and passion are essential.   Today, I am still here. I am still a leader. If I can do it then you can, too. Here are some things I learned along the way:   You Don’t Have to Do it Alone:   I have always needed people around me. My fellow leaders, family and friends have gotten me through the hardest times and my faith has truly anchored me during the storms. When the responsibility of leadership feels large and crushing, I remember to lean on them and ask them for help, for a word of encouragement, a listening ear, advice and sometimes a kick in the butt. Listening to other leaders reminds me that I’m not the only one experiencing leadership challenges. I learn from those who have gone before me and am inspired by those who have continued to lead.   Remember the Vision:   My dad was passionate about providing technology to non-profits and those who couldn’t pay the market rates. His passion carried him through the toughest of times. He had vision for a company that charged significantly lower rates than the competition and could still be successful. He didn’t give up until he had done it. I am thankful for his example. His passion reminds me the reason behind the work that I do, and on the hard days, that’s enough.   Don’t Work Too Hard:   Do work hard, but also laugh. There’s always room for fun. Make sure you don’t staunch other people’s humor or joy. Don’t book your days so full that you don’t have time for a great conversation, or to listen to a joke or to join in when someone is playing a game. Be light-hearted, quick to listen, smile and forgive. Remember not to take yourself or the work too seriously. Remember to see people for who they are and not what they can do. This will create a culture at work that is attractive and successful. It will bleed over into your leadership team and into their lives at home, making a huge different in their lives and your own.   Don’t Quit:   Sometimes the best advice is just to keep going. Get up tomorrow and do it again. Don’t give in to the stress or the negativity. Don’t believe that you can’t do it. Failure is not final if you don’t give up. Expectations might change and the work you are doing might shift. You may need to change your mindset or shift your priorities or take a step back for a season, but don’t stop. Don’t throw in the towel. Other people need you to be a good leader and to persevere when it gets hard. Remember the vision, ask for help, and keep going.   At Impact of Leadership, our goal is to come alongside you to help you grow. We can relate to all that you’re going through. We can help you avoid burnout and give you a place where you feel comfortable, have fun and get your cup filled. We know it’s hard to grow and learn while leading at the same time, so we have lots of resources available to you on the website.   Check out our 164 podcasts and 114 blogs.   Reach out, I’d love to connect with you.   Remember you’re not alone.